Category: Parenting Tips

6 Tips For Effective Awards For Children

Educating children requires a good dose of intuition but it is often not enough, especially when bad behaviors appear that we want to eradicate. Formerly it was said that “the letter with blood enters” and they bet on punishments, even physical , to shape the behavior of children. However, today we know that punishments are counterproductive and can leave deep traces in the emotional sphere, so it is preferable to resort to rewards.

Obviously, it is not possible to educate only on the basis of rewards since these also contain a certain dose of risk, especially if we do not know when is the right time to give the rewards or if we get used to the child to move just because he knows that later a present. Rewarding is better than punishing, but it must be done with measure because rewards are a double-edged sword.

Reward the child for a specific behavior

Parents often think it is important to reward the child for good behavior. And they are right, but rewarding good behavior can lead to multiple interpretations. For this reason, it is best to reward specific behaviors, such as having done a school project, having cleaned the room without being asked, or having helped clean the garden.

Reward him immediately after good behavior

If you reward your child before doing a good deed, the reward will turn into a bribe and you are teaching him to blackmail you. In fact, it is not even convenient that you motivate him by saying that when he finishes he will be rewarded, you must give him the award without having anticipated it.

Prizes should not always have a monetary value

Parents often associate a prize with a gift, but this doesn’t always have to be the case. In fact, it should not be like that because in this way you will only be promoting materialistic values. You can reward him with family activities, such as walking in the park or riding a bike, or even with a few simple words of congratulations or a special dessert.

Reward small goals too

Most parents reward good results when a stage is over, such as when the school year comes to an end. However, it is important to convey to children that sometimes the result is not as important as the effort. Therefore, it is not always necessary to wait for the final stretch, sometimes it is much more educational to reward the effort you have made.

Look for the right rewards

Not all rewards work the same for all children, it depends on the preferences of each one and the things they crave the most. You can’t reward your child with a candy that he hates or a toy that he finds boring. Before choosing the reward, think about the things or activities that you really like and can motivate you.

Don’t reward all behaviors

Rewards cannot become the only educational strategy because, in the long run, they will become habitual and will lose their motivational value for the child. It’s best to use gifts and compliments occasionally. Therefore, use rewards only to reward tasks or behaviors that have required a real effort or that have performed well.

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5 Strategies For Your Child Not To Be Overcome By Frustration

As the child grows, he gains autonomy and independence. As a consequence, he stops accepting the control exercised by adults and begins to demand his rights and wants to enforce his preferences. However, often their cravings for independence are ahead of their abilities, so frustration does not take long to appear, either when parents impose certain limits or when they cannot perform a certain task because they do not have the necessary skills.

However, making mistakes is part of development and learning. Therefore, making mistakes and feeling frustrated is not always negative, the problem appears when the child is not able to handle frustration and has little tolerance for failure and mistakes. Fortunately, parents can teach them to be more tolerant. How to do it?

Let him be wrong

No parent wants their child to make mistakes and suffer disappointments, but mistakes are also learned and it will be very difficult for a child to deal with frustration if they never make mistakes . Give your child the opportunity to do things for himself, avoid overprotectiveness, and allow him to make decisions or engage in tasks and activities that represent a challenge for his current developmental level. Only then will you mature and learn to handle frustration.

Help him identify frustration

When children are young, they are not able to recognize their own emotions so they cannot identify frustration, which they often express through irritability and aggressiveness. One of the parents’ missions is to teach him to recognize the first signs of frustration and to explain what this state consists of. Point out that when he makes a mistake, can’t do something, or faces a limit, frustration can set in. Also, explain that this feeling is not positive because it makes him lose patience and generates anger or sadness. If the child learns to recognize the first signs of frustration, he will be able to change activities before becoming angry.

Teach him to ask for help

Perseverance is one of the values ‚Äč‚Äčthat we all want to develop in our children, but there is a very fine line between tenacity and stubbornness. And children should be aware of it. Explain that it is important to make an effort to achieve a goal but that it is also valid to ask for help when we are stuck and cannot keep moving forward. If you are faced with a problem, it is good to persist and try to find other solutions, but if you do not succeed, you should know that your parents are there to help you.

Encourage him to participate in a role play

Most children love to act out characters so a great strategy to teach them to deal with frustration is to use role plays. You can encourage him to imagine a child who has not been able to solve a certain problem and has been frustrated ; Then you ask him to take on another role and to comfort that same child. In this way you will be teaching him that there are always other points of view and that nothing is black and white.

Encourage appropriate activities for the child

Children are very curious so it is not uncommon for them to engage in tasks that are beyond their abilities. This is a way to grow and learn but when the child is not prepared to face certain challenges, he can become frustrated and if this happens often, his self-esteem will end up being damaged. Therefore, make sure that the goals your child sets are appropriate for his age and within his reach.

Last but not least, don’t forget that your example is the best strategy for teaching a child to handle frustration.

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